How to navigate Mother’s Day as a separated or divorced parent
For some, Mother’s Day is a special time of year but for others this day can be difficult to navigate. For parents who are separating or divorced planning for Mother’s Day can create stress and/or tension between them.
It can be especially difficult when Mother’s Day falls on a weekend when the other parent is due to have the children.
Issues relating to poor communication and lack of compromise between separating and divorced couples often come to the fore around national holidays and specially recognised days, like Mother’s Day, which are emotive, and tensions can run high.
In this blog we give you some tips to hopefully assist in navigating any difficulties and enjoying Mother’s Day.
Plan ahead
If the date for Mother’s Day falls outside your usual parenting time, it is worth discussing with your ex-partner whether he will agree to swap the day or at least part of the day. You can agree that you do the same for Father’s Day.
Document a Parenting Plan
This is a useful document that sets out the arrangements for the children as well as intentions as to how national holidays and other ‘special days’ are to be spent.
New traditions
If necessary, you could organise and recognise your own Mother’s Day for a date when you have the children and make it a special day.
If you are on your own on Mother’s Day
Plan a nice day with your family or friends; pamper yourself; stay off social media. Arrange to FaceTime the children wherever they are.
Mediation
If you need some help, you could arrange mediation sessions to discuss and agree on the child arrangements overall, which can then be recorded in a Parenting Plan and hopefully help to set expectations for the future.
Arbitration
If you are unable to agree on what is best for the children, instruct an Arbitrator to make the decision as to what arrangements would be in the children’s best interests.
Court
This is really the last resort given the delay, expense and inherent uncertainty involved in court proceedings, but if you're struggling to comunicate with you ex-partner this can be an option.
Mother’s Day is about celebrating the love and care you provide as a parent, so prioritising your children’s wellbeing and finding ways to make the day special for everyone involved is very important. If you are unable to adjust the arrangements this year, consider how you intend to deal with this in the future.
Our family lawyers are experienced in dealing relationship breakdown and children arrangements. If you need any advice, please contact us and we will be happy to help.